Wednesday, March 10, 2010


Beauty wants to be seen. It needs to peek out! But, is this gecko seen? Or unseen? Veiled or viewed? And I cannot believe that Thom, of 3WW, did not know what he was hoping for when he came up with the 3WW word, this week. Good on him.Dear Gentle Reader,

It is 3WW time.

This week the prompt words are modify, obedient, and veil.

Your starter is a titled picture with, as always, descriptions if you run your mouse over the image.

Then, as usual, I serve up three haiku/senryu, each with an American Sentence title.

For dessert, a musical offering.

If you're like me, have dessert first, and enjoy it while reading.

So, away.

Let the games begin with modify, obedient, and veil...

Please, Sir, up or down, in or out, fast or slow, ..., do you like it, sir?

A veil keeps sin out.
But, modified, with shimmies...
...obedience in...

** Bearing in mind that not everyone speaks English as a first language, all my poems are meant to be read aloud.

The last line of this haiku has a greater effect, I think, when these two words are in the same eigenspace of comprehension as their oral/aural equivalent...

...'obedient sin'...

...then shimmy the two in your mind...

...obedient sin/obedience in...

...then tell me what is obedient, and to whom, and you're a better man than I am, Gunga Din.

Sarkozy wants her to be strong (obedient); "Modify thy veil!"

Obedience or
Obeisance? Try my veil./? It
modifies me?/. Thee?/.

** With a Gallic shrug, and a governmental tug, her veil could be gone... ...Sarkozy, President of France, declared that the burqa, the full body 'veil', is not welcome in France. Six months later, a French parliamentary committee recommended banning full veils from public buildings.

Now your humble scribe is not going to be drawn into a discussion of the nuances between purdahs and burqas, hijabs and niqabs.

One bottom line is that either people have freedom to choose their elements of expression in apparel or they do not.

And, of course, properly, both sides of the debate can argue that they are for the
freedom to choose elements of expression in apparel and that the other side is against the same proposition.
Which, in a way, is part of the wonderful duality of life. Long live the differences.
Point and counterpart sometimes produce harmony, but, today, in France, they produce dissonance. And the score has not even been finished--it is certainly not settled.
I've tried, in the poem, to shimmy between the interrogative and the declarative and it is meant to feel dissonant.
I'm just not so sure that it works.
Like France's policy.

At 'de Ent o' days, when 'de Taliban come, sleepin', not fightin's, sin!

Oh Bee, 'de Ent' comes!
Modify 'dose bad ways quick!
I won't wear no veil!


Click to hear 'At an Arabian House Party' by Raymond Scott and his Orchestra



ThomG said...

You know, I heard veil on Monday and knew that it had to be included in 3WW. Such a great word.

as always, I find your writing to be layered, that you read and read again to pick out new thoughts, new meanings. And reading out loud, a good call.

Andy Sewina said...

Nicely! I had a good little shimmy down there!!

Both Sides of Ben Marlan said...

The gecko is an impression provided by the artist. to ask if it is seen or unseen is a dichotomy away from the impression itself. or in other words a two option opinion. however, an impression is the artists personal interpretation of the point they wish to transfer. in that sense they change it from the original. So the question would be more like is my impression of the gecko seen or unseen. since the the Q&A both have their opposites in tow, it falls upon the clear sighted to just experience it. I like it though. looks pretty

Cloudia said...

veiled, yet shines.

Aloha from Hawaii my Friend!

Comfort Spiral

Julie Jordan Scott said...

I especially enjoyed the second haiku. Beautiful.

Lilibeth said...

Obedience or obeisance? It's all in attitude, isn't it? Nicely stated.

Stan Ski said...

At 6am first light thoughts such as these are just the stimulus I need to organise my own thoughts.

Angel said...

Nicely done as always!

Teresa said...

The shimmies induced by that lucious (lacivious???) music must be the "obedient sin" to which you refer... Unfortunately, the veils were ripped and lost in various moves, so no props for a belly dance :) Today's music was a definite Schwarzwalder Kirschtorte--rich and intoxicating. (A+) The gecko was freaky, especially to one contemplating an obediently sinful yet veilless dance. (Gothic A+). The first one was just magnifique. (A++). The second one works on so many levels. (A+++). And the last one, hmmm, the last one. You are soooo clever and sooo crafty. But I was not aware that Tolkien's Ents were veiled creatures or that they battled the Taliban. I thought they fought Saruman. Maybe I've mixed my metaphors. (A) (Your bond ratings are better than those of the USA)

Sepiru Chris said...

Dear Thom,

Thank you for your compliments. And thank you for the words.

Dear Andy,

Nothing is more fun than a quick shimmy!

Dear Ben,

I'm chuckling, and really enjoying your comment. Hopefully I will find some time this week to get back to visiting. Renovations are almost over, and I am waiting for packing boxes to be delivered to the house.

Aloha Cloudia,
It is always nice to know that you have been by.

Dear Julie,

I really am pleased that you liked the second piece. Thanks for letting me know. It is a bit more outré with the declarative/interogative shimming/shimmering effect I tried out.

Dear Lilibeth,

It might well be, Lilibeth.

Both in the observed and in the observer.

Dear Stan,

Then rise and shine, Stan, rise and shine!

Dear Angel,

Thank you.

Dear Teresa,

I bow with gratitude.

But, Ents? (From my forebear?)


That was meant to be dialect...

The End of Time...
'De Ent of Time...

Apocalyptic, as the Taliban's arrival would be, especially for two women.

Bee is, likely, a woman, although she is deemed the fighter, and the unnamed speaker has to be a woman, because she won't want wear no veil.

And, in the title I did say that lazin' about would be a sin when the Taliban come, and that fightin' would not be a sin. So Bee needs to get off her beautiful behind, pick up a gun, and start fightin'!

I admit that this haiku may be the weakest of the three this week(although I am still very unsure of haiku number two, this week); but, the voice of the speaker, and her rhythm of speech, just rings through my brain, so I like that.

You probably need to hear me speak it.

The first line has two iambs and then a stressed last syllable.

The second line is complicated. Stressed unstressed unstressed, then stressed, and accelerate, all the way to the end of the line.

The last line is read with trochaic meter.

It makes me smile, which is good enough for me the creator, but maybe not a good enough reason to serve it up to the world at large.

Tschuess all,

Dee Martin said...

I love the picture - as weather here warms, the geckos will be returning. Interesting combination, obedience, sin, and the word shimmy. Shimmy has a less than chaste meaning for me and it definitely creates a dissonant shade.
Working in a high school, clothing and the statement it makes are frequently discussed - too much is unveiled! As always, much to think about here.

Tumblewords: said...

Your words and thoughts shimmy far beyond the obedient veil. Always, nice work.

murat11 said...

Brother: G. Stein seems to be your patroness these daze. How you do shimmy! I'm with Teresa on her bond ratings, though obedient sin is delicious enuff to, er, purloin. I shan't, mind, but it's mighty (mighty) tempting. (Mighty.)


Teresa said...

I tried to read the third one per your instructions; it was somewhat better, but I can't make out the accents or dialect. Probably too much Chinese exposure and not enough Arabic or Pashtu. Is Tolkien your forebear? Or was that Saruman?

The second poem does work, very well. It just doesn't shimmy because it is political commentary. Your first poem is truly a hard act to follow. That's what happens when you serve/eat the dessert first.

@Murat, I believe when you "borrow" a word or two from a classic (as the A+ bond ratings make these), it's called an "allusion" and is perfectly acceptable. Of course, our scribe has this blog so hung with copywrite warnings against plagiarism and then there are the barrister's silks and socks somewhere in Canada, so you may want to translate from English to Spanish to Navajo code language before actually posting those words in a poem on your blog.

one more believer said...

geckos, well, ya know ya always hear em before yr seen em...comforting creatures and more so than humungus flying thousand year old cockroaches...always dessert can't be helped!..shorthand yes, the veil has so many interpretations just as you say...a ways back the word veil was a topic on one of the prompts and bc i just watched a program on the women in afganistan and the blue veil head to foot wanted to understand the purpose and, had no idea of how many different sorts of veils..needless to say it was repressive but yet again, when a woman has a choice it makes all the difference in the world... i find it very interesting france's perspective and look back to the previous president..lalalalalalalala.....yes means no and no means yes and maybe depending on which witch...yeah, good stuff chris!!!

Timothy P. Remp said...

I always look forward to reading your work each week. Your pieces and intersights stay with me long after I've read them.


My 3ww:

The United Statesian said...

The veil is being debated here in Spain as well; however, the anti-veil group gets tripped up when the nun's clothing are brought into the debate...

Not such an easy question in a place like Spain with so much history with both Catholic and Muslim cultures...