Monday, June 8, 2009

My Town (as it is), by Pommes

Image of Pommes showing off his neck ruff.Dear Gentle Reader,

Your humble scribe slept like a log, last night.

A log harassed and harried by both a rabid, toothless beaver and a lumberjack without the requisite skill or understanding for his trade.

He, the humble scribe, is currently passed out. So, today, I will take you on a quick tour of my world.

First, though, I need to address some concerns that I have seen raised.

The humble scribe and the Heroine take adequate care of my needs.

Not brilliant care, of course, Really. Salmon allowances could always be upped. But, certainly, adequate care.

When I came back from the clinic, they made me a lovely herbal tea and brought me flowers, although I eschewed the tea for my regular cuppa fish sauce.

Image of Pommes at the window, drinking, back home in Hong Kong.
Anyway, they try.

So, today, I thought that I would give you a very quick tour around my town which is this apartment, as the denizens of Hong Kong apparently eat anything with a back that points to heaven.

I asked to go outside on my own, and told the humble scribe that I would do this whenever locals came along...

Image of Pommes lying on his back.

The humble scribe then broke down the math on the numbers of people in Hong Kong, their prevalence in the streets, and the number of restaurants per block.

We both decided that it was best if I stayed in.

So, here is my world, at least the salient bits...

Here is my bed.

Image of Pommes' first bed.

Here is my daybed.

Image of Pommes's daybed, number one, from the floor.
Well, that is what it looks like from the ground. Supposedly it is a sofa or a chesterfield, but by the time I leap up there it feels just right for a daybed.

Here is a closer look... it's padded just right for settling down into...

Image of daybed number one, up close.
Image of Pommes on his second daybed.Here is daybed number two. I set the camera on timer, and gave myself a good half hour for a snooze, and woke up a bit disoriented.

This bed is nice, although the Heroine and the humble scribe hog it at night.

I could show you daybeds three, four, five, and six...

...But, I don't want to give you the wrong idea, so I might skip those, today.

Some people ask about the cuppa fish sauce.

(Miss Kitty? Dylan? Take notes...)

The daily cuppa fish sauce is what keeps my coat glossy and my physique rippling with good health.

Image of my favourite drinking glass.Actually, it is more than just a cuppa fish sauce, it is a cuppa liquid papyrus extract, just right for an ancient Akkadian writing cat, supplemented with essence of fish.

The humble scribe thinks that the fish are there to eat any mosquitoes that might try to breed in the tanks.

What bumpf.

The fish are there for the same reason there are worms in tequila.


I like my water tasty.

Image of a water flavouring agent.
Now, don't worry. I don't eat these flavour sticks.

Nor the ones in the other rooms.

All these flavour sticks are too strong.

I prefer salmon.

Or, as salmon is not fresh here, koi.

Look at this smorgasbord I found the other day, on my way back from the clinic... I am hoping someone will take me here for lunch, or I start complaining to the readers... hint, hint...

Image of a pool of koi in a feeding frenzy... Pommes wished he were in the feeding frenzy, too...

I could show you more, my secret cave, the chemical weapons factory, or my favourite places to watch pigeons. But I'm a bit sleepy now, and bed number five is calling me with its dulcet siren call.

But, hopefully, this gives you an idea of my world.



Teresa said...

Dearest Pommes,

It is such a joy to see you alive and well and sleek and glossy. Your daily fish sauce tonic certainly does wonders for your glossy coat.

Thank you so much for the tour of your "town." I hope the Scribe and the Heroine do the honorable thing and take you back for a feast of koi. It's the least the scribe can do to repay you for keeping the readers of his blog interested and entertained during his long e-interregnum. Without you, some of us surely would have moved on to wittier pastures...

Was the scribe really "working" all that time??? Next time let us in on what really happened during the so-called e-interregnum. We are dying to hear all the dirt...

Your adoring fan,

Teresa said...

Oh and Pommes,

I wanted to ask, what is a gorgeous feline like you doing with a secret cave and a chemical weapons factory? Is it true what the scribe said, that you fell in with some shadier sorts in rehab? You're not thinking of taking over the HK underworld are you? Please say that you're not...

Or do those areas of your "town" belong to the scribe in his more nefarious persona of "the Haikuist"? If so, Pommes, you might want to rethink your demands for koi.

Affectionately and with much concern,


pattinase (abbott) said...

Oh, for a daybed.

Travis Erwin said...

Those Koi look big enough to eat you.

Barbara Martin said...

This humble reader would like to know more about the secret cave and the chemical weapons factory, and WHY a cat would be so involved.

This humble reader also adores felines with white facial markings and white feet.

Sepiru Chris said...

Dear Teresa,

He still controls the food. And the spending money. He works mighty and hard and we love him so...

If there was dirt (and there is none) [that I can tell] then I would need salmon packed in dry ice to sustain me through the bleak days that would follow...

Dear Teresa (part two)

I could tell you, but...

Dear Debra,

Or six...

Dear Travis,

But they have no claws nor shiruken nor chemical weapons...

(Koi ceviche with an added soupçon [or four] of vermouth, or, daringly, pernod... mmmmm, miao...)

Dear Barbara,

You are truly a connoisseur of beauty. But great beauty, as I am sure you are aware, comes at a price.

Faust had "der Pudel"; I have a humble scribe...

I cannot say more about my operations; UN investigators are in the region...

Ciao Bellas (and Travis),

Teresa said...

Dear Pommes,

Should I send the salmon on dry ice to the Chungking Mansions? Will you be able work out a deal with the cockroaches for delivery? I do so want to hear the dirt...

I daren't ask for your address for fear the UN investigators read this blog.


Cloudia said...

Strong writing, my dear.
You write just like you speak!
(ooops! note to self: replace da phone card)

your home is lovely as you said.

i crave fishy water now, or better: fish oil......
(I'm licking my paw right now)

breathlessly, Miss Kitty MD (My Daybed)
Aloha, as 'they' say